When I did get up, I went downstairs to get a drink, and suddenly was overcome with tears. I found myself sobbing with longing. I didn't want to be here, I wanted to be somewhere else.
I saw the place, I saw the dew on the grass and smelt the freshness coming towards me. I heard the cry of buzzards turning over head, and felt the chi energy swirling, turning and transforming me. I felt what it was like to be somewhere else, and I missed it with a longing so strong I thought my heart would break.
And I have no real cause to feel such loss! I am so lucky to live where I do. I have fields and trees aplenty. I can get in the car and in a few minutes be deep in the woodland, listening to the birds and the sounds of the river.
But it's not where I dream to be. It's not where my soul tugs and tugs at me to go. It's not where I should be.