Have you heard of Generalised Anxiety Disorder? If you have you will know it means the 'sufferer' worries about EVERYTHING. Nothing is too big or too small to be outside the parameters of the GAD person. The welfare of an ant that has lost one of its legs gets exactly the same amount of concern as the impending arrival of an apocalyptic asteroid from deep space. In fact, from my perspective, the asteroid worries me slightly less. I can only account for this distortion in anxiety levels by assuming the suffering of all ants will only be momentary should we be hit by an asteroid, whereas the legless ant will have to struggle on in agony for days.
I am worn out with worry. I cannot pretend otherwise. I'm almost so exhausted with it that I am at the stage where it's becoming humorous. I could almost see myself lying on the sofa giggling like a lunatic when the latest environmental catastrophe is announced - but not quite.
Apparently not everyone feels like I do! Apparently there are people who don't spend their days in a kind of self imposed prison of anxiety and fear. There are people out there who feel free enough to enjoy themselves! Wow! What would that feel like? They go out and have FUN.
I seem to remember having fun in 1972, but I'm not sure.
I've been told the problem is I think too much. That's not what they told me at school. Back then they told me I was lazy and careless. I would rather be lazy and careless than the bundle of nerves I am now.
Maybe it will change, and maybe it won't. This planet will go on in some form no matter how I'm feeling. Human beings will go on doing things I wish they wouldn't, and bees will either survive or they will become extinct and my worrying about it isn't going to make the slightest difference.
Can I bee happy and stop worrying? Is it possible? To bee or not to bee...